Left Wing, Right Wing

What is the best idea when among what I--William, it sure looks like the "V" person--call "Brain Jacked Illuminati?" Plan nothing. Do as little as possible, and as with grandpa Howard, it really drives the "spy action figures" nuts. "Team America, World Police?" Wait until I get the South Park writers in court. May I take a political position? A sexual position? I promise not to urinate in the California bushes if I am allowed to launder my olive green sweatpants at your place. As for my old, olive green Gulfstream that looks like a big penis, "we" shall not speculate who those guys are, but I'd hope the FAA knows.

Yes, let us "wing it" before I e-mail the Clayton, Missouri cops and wonder what happened to the Intelligence Report of the Southern Poverty Law Center, a publication that sat on Col. Norm's couch unread @ 911 St. Rita, because when I get into politics and write books, I really do write the book, unlike Palin, or Mr. Bush dictating from his Barkalounger. (I note Google will turn my blog into a book, but I need to establish a bank account to gain monetarily, which has been made impossible by "make up the rules as you go along" brain-jacked California bankers. May I have a ride to Missouri? I'm calling Governor Brown's office on Thursday for comedic effect).

Alright, let us review what the SPLC has labeled nuts-o conspiracies. Keep in mind, I am Mr. Hughes, and (possibly well-placed) people tell me things.

CHEMTRAILS

On the computer where I sit, a clever hacker has put my very own digital photo of these on the machine as a Microsoft sample pic. How did "they" do that? I don't know, but some lady named "Melinda" was mighty curious about the ending to hughesscreenplay #8. May we film three versions before I am due in Iowa? Just wondering, movie business Mafia Man.

MARTIAL LAW

Please, we cannot let NASCAR Dads think the only sign of law and order in the USA, that being our local policeman, is in cahoots with something called a "metropolitan government." The cops must do something right, given it is four, maybe five years since they held up a bulletproof vest on Clark Street as I went by in my White, 1992 Nissan 240SX a Russian now wants to buy. First, we must ask the Clayton, Missouri police where the f*** my car is, and proceed from there.

FEMA CONCENTRATION CAMPS

Who are the "bad guys" in my very first screenplay effort, The Rainbow Rebellion? FEMA, but please, get a grip. What did the .gov man say? "Others believe we have a somewhat sinister role...it is not realistic to think that we can convince them otherwise and it is advisable not to enter into the debate on the subject." Amen! That said, you did not find the real secret prisons, sending Soldier Boys to an actual paper atlas at the Saint Louis County Library. When John Dean spoke there, I wanted an autograph, but demurred for the safety of us both.

FOREIGN TROOPS ON U.S. SOIL

I share the joke in asking who would want to try that with average citizens armed to the teeth. However, my witty remark has long been, "Who'd hold off the Russians, our Fairbanks, Alaska police?" The Chinese are coming? What was that movie with Belushi? 1941? It would be just like that, and don't argue with me, because Hughes Aircraft was out here, and I am here, too. May I have a lift to Missouri? You can even call it "Missourah," if you wish.

DOOR TO DOOR GUN CONFISCATIONS

Did I ask the Washington, Missouri police to go into a house full of guns, and they refused? They did. Did the Washington, D.C. police laugh at me in 2008? They did. Me? President? No more Air Force One, and our/your U.S.Navy already has the bridge of my boat coated with aluminum foil. What did the United States Supreme Court say? I have not read the case, but I think it was basically, "Praise the Lord, and pass the ammunition." They said it, I did not.

9/11 AS A GOVERNMENT PLOT

I have no comment, until either CNN, Fox, and the rest of the "candipod" gang shows to see me pay my $26.00 library fine at the Grant R. Brimhall Library, or my second book I really wrote titled Gangster Nation is published. Did it get even weirder since I finished that baby in early 2006? Yes, it did, because I've wondered to myself if the WTC Towers are lying intact out in the Saudi desert. Got Google satellite search? Start looking, America!

POPULATION CONTROL

Patriots, you are thinking wrong. Just ask one question. Who is on the International Space Station (ISS) and what the f*** are they doing up there? Think "Dr. Strangelove," if you dare, because I really did mutter something like, "Jesus, that is the NASA logo" when a jet flew over my laundromat in Concord, NH really low. Does anybody keep radar data? I think they do. Big problem on Earth, like we're all dead, and "they" repopulate? Who are they, NASA? Names, please, this is William V, and I'm running for president, too.

HAARP

One of my favorite topics, and Art Bell did read my fax on the air in the glorious 1990's. Directed energy weapons? Hey, I did not scrape my knuckle, and as for the 3-4 puncture holes in my right hand at one time, I think I need a newfangled type lawyer or something. Blood transfusions from the Planet Zoltar they were not. Did you say "weather modification?" How about 10 days under a dirty, damp blanket as it rained, rained, rained? At least I had a blanket, right spies? Earthquake in Haiti? Just Illuminati killin' some excess niggahs, that's all. No rock n' roll next door in Santo Domingo? Let us go to the NSA's Greatest Hits Boxed Set:

H: "What the hell are you doing down there?"

B: "I work in an office."

Were you creeps reading minds back then? 1988? The grav stuff was operational then, because teenagers cannot jump 15 feet in the air, and I do not have "Bipolar Affective Disorder." Have they circled the wagons at the Washington University Medical School? How's Bucky Bush doing? What did I think in real-time at 11019, the address our United States Government won't allow me to change? "She's got to be CIA or DEA."

Maf-IA? As Johnny Carson often said, "I did not know that." How bad is it? Could I get some help out of the Justice Department, before I get elected and fire you all? The U.S. economy sucks so bad, even lawyers are out of work, and that has nothing to do with "chemtrails."

THE FEDERAL RESERVE CONSPIRACY

May I file Hughes v. Federal Reserve Bank in the Eight Circuit? Got a fed reserve beef from the far Left or far Right? Hughes will "take care of you."

THE NORTH AMERICAN UNION

I really do read stuff like Council on Foreign Relations reports, because I am running for president, dumbass. Mark "Mafia" Williams cannot "Call the cops" if I ask for $50, because Andrea Koval, his boss, says, "This is a public building." But now, ca/vc Maf-IA pool shooters are asking me for $50. As the uncles often said, "You can't win." If they were talking about "Spy Wars," the statement was correct. When it comes to 2011 "Star Wars," if I am all of that, meaning UK, EU, got ru buddies, the potential Saudi King is that guy?, she was the South African diamond girl, got guys in Liberia, won the argument with a pissed-off Vietnamese Royal (I think), told the Israeli fighter jock to buy his own jet in 1977 (with a Shin Bet witness), got Chinese girls swarming, and even cab drivers in Tehran, but I did not ask for any of this, and much more. Uh, I'd stand down on any nutty high-tech attack on the concept of nation states if I were you, because they have worked just fine for many centuries.

Pardon me, conspiracy buffs, gotta go to the CIA Factbook, which does indeed have a fact or two. The female spying on me longer than lovely Andra 2.0 is from Zimbabwe, and I even spelled it right, according to Google spell-check. How embarrassing to think they had coastline! "You're thinking of Mozambique," she said. Hey, let's go to Iowa & New Hampshire, no cue cards or teleprompter required!!!