GE Death

All over but the shouting. No? Could you talk, please? Oh, that's right. In Thousand Oaks, California the policeman pumps his fist outside the Goebel Senior Adult Center's Chaparral Room, instead of saying, "Attaboy Hughes." As we said in North Saint Louis County, in Missourah, "Be that way."


Did I use the word "unreal" last night? Someone must read my blogs, because here is what happened, Cal Tech:
1. I exited the Goebel Senior Adult Center at 8:55 p.m.
2. I took the GE radio off of my Ralph's Cart/Victor's Backpack combo.
3. I put down the radio on a wall that is about one and a half feet tall.
4. I turned my back.
5. BANG! Down went the radio, all by itself. NOTHING TOUCH THE RADIO, sir.
6. "Damage control! Damage control!" The initial assessment? "C" Batteries scattered about the Goebel patio. Back cover off. Examined radio. Big dent. Very hard plastic bowed. OFF/AM/FM knob missing, as was the VOLUME knob.
7. Newton was wrong observation? Why the loud bang? I thought all objects fell at the same rate, regardless of the leaning tower's height. [No "Tower Tee diversions today, soldiers].
8. Hughes, not loud at all trash talk commenced. "Who gives a shit? I'm not listening to that propaganda anyway. NPR sucks. Bunch of liberal liars. Call Dennis Miller's show? Milled soap? Screw all of you. Miller, you gotta be kidding, I thought you were a liberal, etc, etc. etc."
9. Where did the radio knobs go? Could not find them. "Disappeared?" Maybe.
10. Hughes relented, and checked if the radio still worked, by plugging it in. Smashed-up? Knobs gone? It still worked!
11. A solemn resolution was made. No more AM radio propaganda. No listening in the wee hours on battery power. Plug it in by day, and go FM only.
12. A HUGHES TOOL COMPANY challenge arose. How to turn the band selector knob with no knob? a). Ben's wire cutters, with an ORANGE handle? Rusted! Not wide enough. I remarked to myself again how you really do want me in deep space, Nazis, because the engineer's/NASA "work around" is my specialty. (Spygirls have indeed carefully observed Hughes chewing gum & paper clip repairs). Scissors with ORANGE handle? No more sharp edge if you are changing from FM to AM with it but...SNAP, it worked.
13. My, there's the Sheriff's SUV. What the f--- does he want?
14. [REDACTED BY HUGHES FOR PRESIDENT, LLC]
15. Time to, as "Darrel the Great Darrel" says, "Lay down," because when you are homeless in USA, you have no bed. And, while I did see the van in front of Cameron's #10 Downing Street with a futon that looks just like mine in the back, this does not help me get a dollar or donut at the present time.
16. EXT. GOEBEL - MORNING>>>A search for the radio's Mick Jagger "shattered" pieces first revealed a Morton Thiokol "O-ring" way to far away to make sense, yet it was recovered and placed over the band switching hole.
17. The investigation continued, with me, the real Hughes, muttering I am Columbo, Matlock, and Rockford rolled into one. Another "O-ring" was recovered.
18. "Where's the damn knobs?," I muttered, and no one "Called the cops."
19. Knob recovered! Which one? The VOLUME knob.
20. Dogged, not a "dog," H-man pressed on, and found the Band Selector Knob as well. How far away, "Number Kooks?" Try 22 feet. Cal Tech and MIT, Andrea Koval will not accept your calls, but I think the Chief of Police is next. Nah, because in March of 2009, they said, "Mister Hughes, we don't care what you do." I guess they, unlike most in California, were not lying.